I went to dinner with my friend and our waiter was very nice. He told me that I could let Jacob run around and they would watch him for me. He commented on how hard it is to go to dinner without the other parent present, following up with an "I'm single, so I know" comment. My friend insisted that I leave him my number, whipping out paper and pen and writing him a message so he would know it was "from me" and not her.
He called the next day and we talked. He asked me questions about what I did and how old I was and I answered while thinking about how surreal it was. I was struck with how hard dating seemed and how nice it would be to just get this part out of the way. Just skip the dating and slip right into a relationship. It doesn't work that way, apparently.
Sunday morning, after we got back from church and the kids were playing in the yard, CS texted me and asked if I was still in church. I told him where I was and he responded by asking if my mom was there. I knew then that he wasn't just asking to see Jacob. He called me and for the first few minutes there was silence, broken by me asking if he was there and talking. Finally I shut up. He said he was sorry. Sorry for being the biggest dumbass in the world. That he loved me. All he wants is to be with me, for me to be his girlfriend and fiancee. He said he will be the man that he was when we met, fell in love, and decided to have a baby.
I honestly thought I would never hear any of this from him. Never. At this point, it's the only thing he could do to attempt to win me back. Because, of course, I want to make it work. We have a baby. We have a timeline for another one. We were going to get married. Our future was made with each other in it and we have a baby to think about. We don't just get to walk away and start over.
