Friday, October 23, 2009

Rethinking Co-Sleeping

Or I get enough sleep now.

Someday, Jacob isn't going to want to sleep next to me. Soon, he will be lifting his arms up to daddy to take him, instead of cuddling with me in the mornings. Someday he will sleep in a big boy bed, only coming in to me after bad dreams. Then he will grow up, become a boy, a young man, an adult. I will not always be the one who can soothe all things. In a day and age when children grow up far too quickly, I'm already imagining how he will turn away from me. My baby is going to grow up and leave me. He will not always need me.

So I'm going to try and relish now. Enjoy the nights where all he wants is to sleep with his body in my arms. Savor the mornings when I wake up a little stiff from sleeping on my side so his head is cradled in my arm, and I watch his lips purse and suck as he sleeps. How can I blame him for not wanting to sleep alone. I haven't for years, and if I had my way then CS would be in bed with us. Before CS and Jacob came along, there was always Hunter to keep me company. I am not one who likes to sleep alone.

I co-sleep. And it's going to be OK.