Somewhere down the line I realized how pointless being indecisive is. Now it's like "What do you want for supper, Logan?" "I don't care, whatever you want to fix." "I don't care. It's up to you." Pause. "I think I want tacos then."
I give the window of opportunity for one considerate indecisive moment, and if the choice has not been made, then I pick. Or, at least this is my goal. Furthermore, apathy is death according to Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic II, and so I try to limit it.
But I've reached a point where I'm not sure about something. I've been toying with a few ideas about some posts, but I don't know if I want to do it or not. In a way it's like stepping off the Grand Canyon and hoping the impact isn't too rough. See, I've recorded a song with vocals and I think it sounds okay. I kind of would like some feedback on it, but I'm not sure really if I really want any or not. I've also got several stories I've been writing on, and I'm thinking of posting a prologue here, too, for similar reasons.
I consider myself an artist. I like to draw/paint/etc. I like to sing and play music. I like to write creative and sometimes thought-provoking pieces. I love theatre, but I'm too busy and too big a chicken to try out, so I watch it instead.
The way I see art is like there is something inside of me, needing to get out in the form of expression. There are times when I simply feel that I have to pick up my guitar and put something out. There are times when I feel that I must write something, anything. These are times when I feel particularly creative. Then there are times when I just want to express my feelings and ideas, and they take the form of song or canvas or prose.
Artists are fickle folk, I think. In that I mean that we're typically subject to our creative whims. The introvert doesn't want to put their stuff out there for the world to see, while the extrovert longs for global fame and recognition. I'm also an engineer, which tends to make me a bit pragmatic and realistic, which tends to fight against the artistic whims.
Ah, well. My rant is over. I've got to get to class. Perhaps I'll reach my decision soon. Lord knows I hate being indecisive.
